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Author
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Topic: "Offenderisms"-S.O. statements
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stat
Member
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posted 06-22-2006 09:41 AM
 
A fellow PCSOT examiner and myself often- times relay what we have affectionately referred to as "offenderisms." These are statements that sexual offenders have made in interviews which are so ridiculous that they bare repeating. I know that every working examiner on this forum --L.E., private, etc have a cache of these little jewels. Please submit to this silliness. Here are a couple of my most recent ones.Offenderism #1----When I asked a paroled S.O.(24 yr old male sexual misconduct conv) why he feels the necessity to be around so many underaged females while on parole he replied (initially) "People come to me with problems....like I can help them...like I'm Jerry Springer or something."
Offenderism #2-----When a middle aged sex. miscond convict was asked why, despite his conviction, he felt that his girlfriend's 18 year old daughter deserved to recieve hands-on "lessons" about her vagina while offender was serving parole--the offender stated "who better to teach her about sex than a sex offender?" I'd like to hear from others--thanks [This message has been edited by stat (edited 06-22-2006).] IP: Logged |
rnelson
Member
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posted 06-22-2006 05:15 PM
OK, sounds fun.hows this... "I guess it turned out that I was doing all this without her permission." or the allarmingly superficial... "that's what was alleged, so that's what we're going with."
r
r ------------------
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here, this is the war room."
--(Dr. Strangelove, 1964) IP: Logged |
rnelson
Member
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posted 06-22-2006 05:17 PM
OK, sounds fun.hows this... "I guess it turned out that I was doing all this without her permission." or the allarmingly superficial... "that's what was alleged, so that's what we're going with."
r
r ------------------
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here, this is the war room."
--(Dr. Strangelove, 1964) IP: Logged |
Ted Todd
Member
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posted 06-22-2006 06:43 PM
This one came from a LEPET yesterday:"There was no way she had passed out because she was still moving" I think his next test WILL be a PCSOT! yagottaluvit! Ted [This message has been edited by Ted Todd (edited 06-22-2006).] IP: Logged |
J.B. McCloughan
Administrator
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posted 06-22-2006 07:39 PM
"I was lying to the questions about @#%^*? That's bullshit! I lied to all the questions!"IP: Logged |
stat
Member
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posted 06-23-2006 09:17 AM
How about-----"o.k.,but every time I do it (have sex with his dog while on parole)I fantasize about my mother."or--
concerning a child porn case where the offender had 97 photos of rough (sadistic) pediphilic sex---Offender stated that he collected the material for the purpose of "suing the internet." ---on a personal note--Remind me gentleman to write to "the internet" and complain about pop-ups. IP: Logged |
stat
Member
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posted 06-23-2006 09:31 AM
When inquiring from a female offender about sex toys (prohibited while on parole) she stated "absolutely not" --"but does my electric toothbrush count as a sex toy?" I asked "how frequently do you use (mast with) it?" and she replied ashamedly "about 3 times a day" ---personal note--ironically, she had horrible teeth.IP: Logged |
stat
Member
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posted 06-23-2006 05:23 PM
Today a paroled child molester said to me in the post test "you know something, I'm starting to feel like I'm being interrogated here" -----at that point I thought to myself, wow--it's like he has a sixth sense.IP: Logged |
stat
Member
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posted 06-26-2006 05:51 PM
When asking a (less than brilliant)paroled rapist about his general sex life with his new girlfriend he stated "She's an old-fashion gal, she just likes to do it in the fetal position."
*examiner note---if you saw this guy you might've pictured a woman cowaring from him during love making.
Come on guys---I feel like I'm dancing alone here with these distortions and bloopers---HUMOR US with your own. The previous threads from others made me laugh out loud---thank you. ---stat IP: Logged |
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